Yeah, I know…a pretty crude title.  So what!…there are worse things like a sick video circulating the Bahamas of a local dog being eaten by sharks.  So…pussy has been put in perspective.  You’re welcome.

It dawned on me the other day that I have become a pussy (yep, there’s that magical word again).

If you’re a Mom then mommy guilt is a thing.  We all know it.  We all feel it.  We all hate it. But it is DEFINITELY A THING.  I personally despise mommy guilt.  It seems like such a waste of time…but there we are feeling badly about everything.  Stayed out to late…guilty!  Didn’t play with both kids an equal amount of time….guilty!  Went to work…guilty!  Stayed home…guilty! Took a shower…guilty!  You catch my drift.  So most of the time I feel pretty damned if I do, damned if I don’t.

So…one day last week during my mommy guilt pity party (provoked by late nights of Eat me Skinny Lunch Box work) I got to thinking about who I really was where I came from and who I want to be.  And this is what I came up with….

I am pretty sure my Mom didn’t give a shit about mommy guilt.  And my grandmother DEFINITELY wouldn’t have.  Because you did what you had to do and that was that.  Children were there to be enjoyed, loved and cherished but they were also not to be catered to every whim (I sure as hell wasn’t catered to every whim….and I kinda turned out ok)!

My Mom always worked and enjoyed it.  She brought work home and that was just what she did.  She played with us but she also had a life.  This must be where I got it from, right?  There must have been some part of me watching this and storing it away for future use…like now when I  am having a life.

But somewhere along the way I seem to have become a marshmallow.  I got soft.  I forgot that people work and that’s ok.  I forgot that kids don’t need a perfect mom.  I forgot that shit just doesn’t have to be perfect.

I especially forgot that having a dream (which usually means being busy) doesn’t mean you’re a shitty Mom….it just means you’re showing your kids that your life’s work is important and that being happy and feeling fulfilled is ok.  BUT what good is doing your life’s work if you’re constantly feeling guilty?

So I am here to reiterate (as I’m sure you already know) that mommy guilt will get you nowhere.  Mommy guilt sucks and I personally am working daily to feel less guilty no matter how long my shower is!

Hopefully you’ll do the same!

xoxo

Ellen

 

 

 


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